Sometimes I wish I could go back to the time when I only drink when I am happy or for no reasons at all. I wish I could go back to the time when I feel indifferent about things, when I feel indifferent about people When I can just spend the whole day thinking about nothing and doing nothing at all. Today is different, even if I don’t want to feel anything, it’s nearly impossible to feel nothing. I wish I could end this. You know, I’d rather die than live the rest of my life feeling this much of a bullshit.